Connect the Dots . . . What do Cannibals and Zombie Cows have in Common?

Well back to that in a few minutes, got to have a Cliff Hanger to build tension and get you worked up for a little Trauma, E.R. Trauma that is.

Well, I say, Speaking of Cliff Hangers, or even just reading between the lines or on old Dot Matrix printers the line would really just be closely spaced dots…., my brain tends to ramble and go out on Walk About out of Walkie Talkie range at times, and what did they have to eat out on the old Open Range, besides free Range Chickens that is, which were rather hard to keep indoors what them guys being right ornery independent cusses and mountain man madness aside they warnt much inta being all hen pecked, inta beans and fatback bacon yah, yep ya betcha bottom dollar, cause if ya had any money, it would be at the bottom of yer pocket, lessen ya had a hole in that there pocket, which would of an in itself be a Darned good reason ta go get hitched to some thang besides a wagon just to have around to do the cleaning an cooking and all that darned wimmen stuff.

Lookit here son, I say son, did ya see that hawk after those hens? He scared ’em! That Rhode Island Red turned white. Then blue. Rhode Island. Red, white, and blue. That’s a joke, son. A flag waver. You’re built too low. The fast ones go over your head. Ya got a hole in your glove. I keep pitchin’ ’em and you keep missin’ ’em. Ya gotta keep your eye on the ball. Eye. Ball. I almost had a gag, son. Joke, that is.

I say, I say Uh-uh-uh, I know what you’re gonna say, son.  You might be asking yourselves what I am thinking, and you would be smack dab on the money, if a little dab would do ya, unlessen it fell outa your pocket hole into some smack dab do, thats doo doo, do ya get me or doo doo ya get me, son. I am and was channeling Foghorn Leghorn, that paragraph above being from

The Foghorn Leghorn (1948) http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0040361/
, who was not a big fan of wolves an coyotes, 2 and 4 legged varieties them varmits being chicken rustlers, he might of gone along with ranchers intentions to tend to keep them younguns cooped up so they had a chance to get a few chickens counted amongst the hens a laying, and the maids a milking all sod busty like, and get some chicken feed expenses recooped.

For some getting a leg up on your Foghorn Leghorn quota check out some quotes at

http://www.imdb.com/character/ch0029619/quotes

Now getting back to the Cliff of the Cliff Hanger, or should I rather say to someone over the Cliffs of Dover way, to whom I would like to dedicate this post.

T.J. Cliffe  of Goodreads.com who has posted his interests as “I am interested in just about anything I learn about. Knowledge is just so… interesting.”

It closely mirrored my own philosophy.  Or what I refer to, but not in a Maryjane way, or a Voyager Janeway, as a philosophy.  My parents clued into it long before I did by the way, hence the gift of a shirt with the quote “Why Be Normal?” at an early age.

Random thoughts, ran them damn thoughts down, down I say, down on the farm, keep them down boy, get down, boogie down, get out of town, get off the furniture, were you raised in a barn, or did you even ever help to raise a barn, barn raising not being an easy thing, but a darn good reason for a social get to gether, to gather friends and neighbors, tho some might say Nay, but Hey, Horses eat Hay!

I have always been one to connect the dots.  To mix metaphors and slice similes.

Take for example Mad Cow Disease? For years I have been telling people that it was the same disease that the cannibal headhunters suffered from called Kuru. Same symptoms. Something most humans didn’t suffer from, except those that ate other humans Brains, like the Fore tribe of Papua New Guinea. Animal feed tends to recycle all sorts of non edible parts, by human standards at least, rendering once vegetarian bovines into Zombie-esquenessity!

From Prion Wikipedia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prion

“Prions are responsible for the transmissible spongiform encephalopathies in a variety of mammals, including bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE, also known as “mad cow disease”) incattle and Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease (CJD) in humans. All known prion diseases affect the structure of the brain or other neural tissue and all are currently untreatable and universally fatal.”

“The Fore tribe of the highlands of Papua New Guinea was investigated at length beginning in 1957 by D. Carleton Gajdusek, who won a Nobel prize in 1976 for his study of the neurological-degenerative disease kuru, which he determined was caused by human contact with infected human brain tissue. Kuru, Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease, and bovine spongiform encephalopathy are all transmissible spongiform encephalopathies (TSE) and were formerly believed to be caused by a slow virus infection; recent evidence indicates that they are conveyed by proteins called prions. Among the Fore, the principal pattern of contact with infected human tissue was during the mortuary preparation associated with endocannibalistic consumption of dead kin. In 1979 William Arens challenged Gajdusek’s explanation for the spread of kuru on the grounds that there were no direct observations of cannibalism in the Fore people.”

“Whether cannibalism reflects pathological behavior depends on the circumstances of consumption. Starvation cannibalism appears to be tacitly condoned by Western societies, and other societies have sanctioned a variety of exocannibalistic practices. But perhaps the most abhorrent practice is that of sadistic or psychopathological murder and consumption of human tissue. Jeffrey Dahmer is a most recent example. A deranged young man who did not appear to be abnormal, he was arrested in Milwaukee in 1991 for the murder, dismemberment, and partial consumption of seventeen individuals. There are many other examples of such bizarre and pathological behavior in the literature.”

Read more: http://www.answers.com/topic/cannibalism#ixzz1b6fkjrnu

Now when you get right down to it, mankind should be grateful that we as a race were able to find and domesticate other species for our food needs.  Humans, despite Jonathan Swift’s “A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland From Being a Burden on Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Publick”  

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Modest_Proposal

which states, “A young healthy child well nursed, is, at a year old, a most delicious nourishing and wholesome food, whether stewedroastedbaked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee, or a ragoust.”

Humans having a 9 month gestation period, and generally giving birth to singular offspring are just not economically suited for a sustainable food source.

On the other hand, take the movie, The 13th Warrior. An awesome movie, one of Antonio Banderas’ earlier works.

Now there was an Army that travelled on its stomach.  You win, you get to eat.  No lengthy supply lines, or baggage trains, no cooks and bottle washers, just hungry warriors out to conquer and get a little T&A.  Even if you loose, just run away to sneak back and eat again another day, or night, scavenge the recent dead or dig up a few for the stewpot.  Brings new meaning to statements like “I’m a Leg man myself”.

They called it  “The 13th Warrior”, rather than the title given to it by the author Michael Crichton”Eaters of the Dead”, because “Eaters of the Dead” would have given away to much of the impact and horror that the scenes of the butchery provide.  Read it, enjoy it, digest it…

Long Pork.  Is it really that human flesh tastes like pork?  Or could it be that the butchered bodies of both Pigs and Humans are very similar?  Pig corpses are often used in simulations to determine the extent of bodily injuries.

I submit that the visible differences between headless human and pig carcasses would be the longer limbs.

If thats not enough Dots, just wait till you get to read the Dashes!

Once again, this is dedicated to, but not to be held to blame for or by, T.J. Cliffe.

Check him out at Goodreads.com or his website at

http://www.autarkik.com/

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